Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize