that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
