I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Damn victory sex feels great
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
