He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
