Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
