did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
