do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
