i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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