The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
