I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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