I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
