do herpes really smell.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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