Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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