so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
