Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
