Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
