College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
