why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
