she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Randomize
