honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
People with herpes should wear stickers.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize