How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
