what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Your cock deserves a montage
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm getting married
To pizza
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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