yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize