I look better un-naked...
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Randomize
