She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize