check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im drinking this country out of the recession.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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