Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
