The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
