Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
