I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
