you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
