New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
