you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
either way he was missing a nipple.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
