DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
