Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
