id be glad to
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize