so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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