Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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