btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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