she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Everything about him screamed your future.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
