Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
