what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
