So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
