Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
