Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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