porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
