Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
