I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
