don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Someone shattered a urinal.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
