Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
