two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
