Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Randomize
